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15.4.11

time doesn't matter to them yet



i started my run this morning with no intention of going there. but between loud music and too many old roads that look the same here i am. at the base of it and 2 miles into a 5 mile route. mile 3 is the hill. there are 3 landings on this hill but once you hit one, it only gets harder. my breath is pacing, my legs have that familiar ache and i think about going around it. as a new song comes on and i have 2 seconds of silence to hear my heart beat and feel a rush of adrenaline, i run. too fast at first, like always. landing one comes and i catch a quick breath. landing two comes and i try not to look at the last stretch of hill in front of me. i take a few deep breaths, change to a new song, close my eyes and run. as hard as i can. all the while my legs are protesting, my mouth tastes funny, my heart feels like it's beating in my ears, a sharp pain in my side begins to grow and push it's way into my shoulder. "breath through it. breath through it." 15 more steps. 10 more steps. 5,4,3,2,1 . . . . . . . . . .   on the other side is 2 slow miles of downhill. it takes no effort, my legs move for me and i feel like i'm floating. i need it, not the hill, but what comes after the hill.

11 comments:

kate said...

oh man. it's been ages since i've had the feeling.

once upon a time years ago, i trained for a marathon. i got to mile 9, and quit (curse you july heat in the desert.) before i quit, i used to run with my best friend. she was shorter than me, and ran at a different pace. i know this is terrible, but i loved leaving her in my dust toward the end of our run. i'd run my hardest to the bottom of the hill, and then wait for her to catch up.

man. i miss that.

kate said...

p.s. i realize this makes me sound like a brat, but it was the ONE thing that i felt like i was better at than her.

curse overly talented friends! ha.

{she + him} said...

How is it that you make running sound so euphoric?!

Unknown said...

love this, and miss this.

carla thorup said...

you are so poetic, and actually make me miss the ache of training.

Mallory Hanna said...

must. go. running. now. Beautiful.

Hannah Jean said...

I saw you running today! Also... yes... lets do lunch before I leave! I would love that! and you will be coming to the Playmill this summer to visit me correct?? Love your face! Ill call you soon.

sheena said...

I love this. We were sooooo thinking the same thing yesterday!
And I love running in Rexburg.....oh that hill. Say hello for me:)

angela hardison said...

dearest kate, how did this make me cry?

beautiful. and now i want to go running. if only it wasn't too hot here to run outside... the treadmill isn't quite the same.

anna said...

this is beautifully written.

you inspire me. i ran this morning and now i'm thinking my 3 miles of flat ground was chump change.

becca said...

hey.

I love the way you blog. it's so neat and thoughtful and pretty :)