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8.2.11

please don't talk over me

i have self-diagnosed anxiety. but it's more like sporadic anxiety, it doesn't show up all the time but when it does... watch out. confrontation gives me anxiety, like sweaty-hand-dizzy anxiety. i'm so emotionally driven that when confrontation arises i always say things i don't mean, so i avoid it at all costs. but confrontation snuck in last week and i tried really hard to stay professional and i think i did okay. it confuses me when adults don't act like adults... in adult situations (cause let's be honest, that's the only time when i act like one) when my house is dirty i get anxiety. like mean-frustrated-anxiety and i just need to turn on some music and clean. or run. lando's learned.

so that equals like 4% of my life, add 2% for when i just feel like being grumpy, so the other 94% i'd say i'm pretty happy. i've got lots to be happy for- confrontation and messy houses aside. for instance, yesterday my dinner turned out bombtastic (yep) and lan told me my hair looked "long and golden." hahaha, his compliments are dah bes.

8 comments:

Unknown said...

you forgot your super crazy roller coaster anxiety! or maybe that is an alter ego-oh that was so fun! i wish i had those pictures of our faces, seriously one of the funniest moments ever.

kate said...

kate.

we're personality twins.

i have people anxiety like REALLLLY bad these days. people standing too closely, standing behind me, next to me. freak out.

oh and don't get me started on driving anxiety. it's so bad here. like i want to start walking because i have mini panic attacks. graham just says "kate. you need to RE-lax." that makes me want to freak out even more.

so,
ya. i understand somewhat where you're coming from.

sorry. once again i've turned a comment into all about me. geez.

ashley mikell said...

yes i definitely think jord and landon would be good friends. they sound very very similar.

Chelsea said...

wait until you have kids. i never knew i had any anxieties until then. now i have extreme heights anxiety, kids drowning anxiety, house messy anxiety, whining anxiety, money anxiety, and throw up anxiety. just to name a few. :/

i swear i'm super fun though (?)

mindy said...

glad i found this blog.

love you

brandilyn said...

ooooohlalalalalala i love your blog!!! YAY! i love your confetti headers. they are so pretty and golden. i loved dinner tonight and girl talk and everything.

Mallory Hanna said...

i found it. i am happy. and it looks beautiful. tonight was much needed, thank you. let's please follow up with a couples night. p.s. I should have got one of your cell phone numbers? who does that? also I did tip our waitress, I forgot at first but then I did. just wanted to clarify, in case you know, you thought...whatever:)

Nicole said...

haha i love that you self diagnosed yourself. so great